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It's been 2 weeks since I blogged. I had not planned on that long of a blogging absence but things have been kind of crazy in my life. The theme of my life lately has been me listening to my inner voice more. I even blogged about it on my Fearless Fridays column on the Belle-Noir magazine blog. For so many years, I have ignored that little voice in the back of my head, telling me I was making a wrong choice or going the wrong way on my path in life. But I ignored that voice and kept going...ended up in a relationship with someone that wasn't right for me, ended up in a job that was not my calling, ended up remaining friends with people who I should have let go a long time ago...I could go on. I know I'm not the only one. You're probably sitting there, nodding your head along with me.
If only life could be simple! But it never is. And part of that problem is that we make things more complicated by resisting the inevitable. We want what we want when we want it, no matter what. And there will be times when those things we want are not meant for us. I think if we all stopped for a moment and actually listened to our inner voice, life would be less complicated. We need to trust our intuition more because it is never wrong. We may not like what it says sometimes but it is never wrong.
So my inner voice is telling me to continue writing and make some career/personal changes this year. I need to let go of some baggage that I have been holding onto for longer than I was supposed to. Baggage are the things/people that come into your life for a season and when they are meant to leave, they should be let go. When they are not let go when the season is over, those things become baggage. And if you carry too much baggage, you buckle under the weight and can't handle any more coming your way. No bueno. Plus, there's only one carry-on allowed on the flight. You don't want that plane to leave you behind - you want to get on that plane to the next adventure in your life.
My inner voice is also telling me to fiercely be me despite what anyone says. Lately, I have been getting some flack on how I am not this or that and that I need to be a little more this or that. And my inner voice is screaming NO!!! My inner voice is telling me, "You are perfect just the way you are. It's just that who you are is sometimes not understood by some and is not in line with what they want you to be to benefit them. But at the end of the day, you have to be true to yourself. Because YOU have to live with yourself...YOU have to look yourself in the mirror and be happy with who YOU are. So those other people? They can kick rocks." My inner voice is pretty kick-ass, lol. I should have been listening to that voice a long time ago. Well, better late than ever. :)
If only life could be simple! But it never is. And part of that problem is that we make things more complicated by resisting the inevitable. We want what we want when we want it, no matter what. And there will be times when those things we want are not meant for us. I think if we all stopped for a moment and actually listened to our inner voice, life would be less complicated. We need to trust our intuition more because it is never wrong. We may not like what it says sometimes but it is never wrong.
So my inner voice is telling me to continue writing and make some career/personal changes this year. I need to let go of some baggage that I have been holding onto for longer than I was supposed to. Baggage are the things/people that come into your life for a season and when they are meant to leave, they should be let go. When they are not let go when the season is over, those things become baggage. And if you carry too much baggage, you buckle under the weight and can't handle any more coming your way. No bueno. Plus, there's only one carry-on allowed on the flight. You don't want that plane to leave you behind - you want to get on that plane to the next adventure in your life.
My inner voice is also telling me to fiercely be me despite what anyone says. Lately, I have been getting some flack on how I am not this or that and that I need to be a little more this or that. And my inner voice is screaming NO!!! My inner voice is telling me, "You are perfect just the way you are. It's just that who you are is sometimes not understood by some and is not in line with what they want you to be to benefit them. But at the end of the day, you have to be true to yourself. Because YOU have to live with yourself...YOU have to look yourself in the mirror and be happy with who YOU are. So those other people? They can kick rocks." My inner voice is pretty kick-ass, lol. I should have been listening to that voice a long time ago. Well, better late than ever. :)
We learn lessons daily, some minor and some major - for me, when I travel, for some reason, getting out of my norm really helps me to see the lesson that needs to be learned. I'm more hungry now more than ever to learn these lessons because honestly, I feel like I woke up when my dad died. A sudden, unexpected death, especially when it's someone who you think will live forever, will wake you up and place you into a state of reality. It has always sounded cliche to me but the saying "Life is too short." is so true. We have to embrace the now. These moments are all we have. Because you don't know where you will be tomorrow. This is the state of reality I am in now and I'm embracing it.
My lessons learned this week are:
I'm starting to get my travel bug back in full force. This desire within me to visit places far, far away is becoming greater. Despite not having a steady exuberant income or a significant other to share the experiences with, I fully believe I can go to Argentina or Africa or Australia and have the time of my life. Anything is possible. I'm just feeling this fire again. I don't know how I got it back but I'm not questioning it, lol.
My lessons learned this week are:
- Stop mourning the loss of seasonal friends. If someone is a lifelong friend, they will never leave your side, no matter how tough things get or how life changes. The friendship will grow and change with these circumstances. When a season ends, a new one begins with new friends. There is no use wasting time, crying over friends who are no longer in your life. Letting go is hard but once you do, you feel lighter because you have let go of unnecessary emotional baggage.
- With lifelong friends, you have to appreciate them as much as you can. Because they are gifts in your life. The other day, I looked at my best friend Herman and I really wanted to cry because so many emotions flooded my heart. He has done so much for me - I don't think he really knows how much I love him. He is the one person who knows me 100% and loves me as I am. He doesn't get annoyed by my anxiety and how I sometimes act a certain way. He takes care of me, even more so now that my dad is gone. My dad was the type of person that if he liked you and admired you, that was a big deal because he just did not dole out accolades like that. When my step-mom met Herman at my dad's funeral, she said "So you're Herman!?! Wow, I am so happy to meet you. Danny always talked about you and he never worried about Marcy when she was with you. Thank you so much for being so good to her." That meant the world to me. Also, the fact that Herman took a day off of work to drive 2 hours each way on a Tuesday to come to the funeral. He's a great friend indeed.
- Stop worrying about what others think. This one is self-explanatory, lol.
- Always be you and never be afraid to be you in front of anyone. If they can't accept you for who you are, they're not worth it anyway.
I'm starting to get my travel bug back in full force. This desire within me to visit places far, far away is becoming greater. Despite not having a steady exuberant income or a significant other to share the experiences with, I fully believe I can go to Argentina or Africa or Australia and have the time of my life. Anything is possible. I'm just feeling this fire again. I don't know how I got it back but I'm not questioning it, lol.
So the last week has been insane and I have not been blogging as I would like to. But I did want to post an update to my last post regarding my health scare. I noticed it was the most read post ever on this blog, which makes me happy because it is so important for us to share our stories and educate others in the process. Going to the doctor for preventive reasons is so important. We have to keep up with how our bodies are doing no matter how scared we are of knowing the unknown. You might just save yourself a major disease or ailment by finding out early on thru preventive doctor visits.
As for me, after 5 days of no Motrin, caffeine, alcohol and meds, my blood pressure has gone down dramatically. I didn't post it before but when I went to the doctor the first time, my blood pressure was 259/126. He was surprised I had not had a stroke yet. **gasps** It is now down to 189/93. So I am getting there. Doctor gave me another pill to accompany the one I am already taking and he gave me the green light to some activity. But I still have to remain calm and not stress out too much. And I also found out I am anemic. I had no idea.
I'm feeling good, though! The heart palpitations are gone. I'm still going to the cardiologist next week to get an echo and make sure that any damage to my heart murmur is not bad. I have my fingers crossed. But I have also made the promise to myself to never let myself get to this point ever again. I love myself way too much to kill myself unintentionally by not taking care of myself.
So with that said, happy Friday! Hug yourself today and do something that makes you smile. The weekend is upon us! :)
As for me, after 5 days of no Motrin, caffeine, alcohol and meds, my blood pressure has gone down dramatically. I didn't post it before but when I went to the doctor the first time, my blood pressure was 259/126. He was surprised I had not had a stroke yet. **gasps** It is now down to 189/93. So I am getting there. Doctor gave me another pill to accompany the one I am already taking and he gave me the green light to some activity. But I still have to remain calm and not stress out too much. And I also found out I am anemic. I had no idea.
I'm feeling good, though! The heart palpitations are gone. I'm still going to the cardiologist next week to get an echo and make sure that any damage to my heart murmur is not bad. I have my fingers crossed. But I have also made the promise to myself to never let myself get to this point ever again. I love myself way too much to kill myself unintentionally by not taking care of myself.
So with that said, happy Friday! Hug yourself today and do something that makes you smile. The weekend is upon us! :)
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