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"My confidence has changed but my options haven't, which is disappointing." ~ Deputy Beauty Editor Lara Capon, Cosmopolitan UK
Last week, I found out that designer Brandon Blackwood launched a clothing collection called Studio, that included plus sizes. To say I was hyped is an understatement.
I'm a Gen X streetwear girl who loves to mix street style with a feminine soft vibe. I have been known to rock a pearl necklace and tulle skirt with a hoodie and sneakers. And Brandon Blackwood gives me that vibe.
Blackwood is an American designer of color whose End Systemic Racism tote bags are still sought after. I own one myself. Black designers such as Blackwood and Telfar Clemens are iconic in Black and Brown culture and deserve ALL the flowers.
I love Clemens' apparel collections but sadly, they only go up to 2XL so there's no way I can fit into his pieces. My fashion soul cries every time I open up an email and see new pieces dropping. So when I heard Blackwood launched apparel, I thought, maybe, just maybe, it would have a size range that expanded beyond a 2X.
And then one of my fave influencers, Sarah Chiwaya aka Curvily, wrote a review of the new collection for Refinery21. That got me really excited. I happen to know Sarah personally as she was a previous guest on my NAAFA-produced fashion web series Ahead of the Curve and is a supporter of size inclusivity in fashion.
However, after reading the article, I was yet again disappointed. The collection ends at a size XXXL (3XL). Sarah is always very candid and upfront in her reviews and while her write-up is an excellent read as always, I am disappointed in Blackwood and the missed opportunity for him to accommodate customers above a size 3XL.
The designer said in the article:
"Our customer range is insane. It’s such a blessing to have our brand celebrated by so many different people, regardless of size. I wanted [Studio] to feel inclusive. I didn’t want anyone turned away because they couldn’t find their size or something they didn’t want to wear. The collection has something for everyone."
*raises hand* I cannot find my size. Am I not included in "everyone"?
As someone who grew up fat and loved fashion, I worked hard to be confident in my skin while navigating a world that made me feel like I wasn't worth taking space, wearing fashionable pieces and just existing. Confidence became my armor and helped me to express myself through fashion. But I still felt limited because I did not have access to clothing like my thinner counterparts.
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| Studio by Brandon Blackwood Draped Jersey Dress, $75 (I would get this in every color if it were in my size!) |
It's gotten slightly better decades later but still, as a size 4X, my options continue to be limited. So the term "inclusive" became a beacon of hope for me at first. I would see a brand say they were size inclusive and I would get excited as that meant to me that they carried my size. And most often, I would be disappointed to learn that they didn't carry my size.
Blackwood says he wanted his collection to feel inclusive. What does that mean exactly if you're stopping at a size 3XL?
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| Studio by Brandon Blackwood Ribbed Zip Hoodie, $45 (I would get this entire look in every color if it were in my size!) |
I realize the term "size inclusive" has become a buzzword and it seems as if it has become this subjective term that brands define to mean whatever suits their purpose. A brand will now use the term if they carry a full size range that includes straight sizes and plus sizes (0 to 3X).
But plus sizes do not stop at a size 3X.
Last time I checked, inclusive means ALL. So size inclusive means ALL sizes. However, I'm a size 26/28. Does this mean I don't exist?
Shoot, there are some brands who only offer up to a size 20!!! And the average American woman is a size 18. SMH. Make it make sense.
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| Studio by Brandon Blackwood Ruched Maxi Skirt, $45 (I think this may actually fit me but it would be a tight fit.) |
It's no secret that the plus size apparel section is profitable. There is money to be made because we need clothes! Yet it's a sector that remains largely untapped. The proof is in the data. Sarah Chiwaya wrote in her recent blog post:
All of the extensive market research done in the industry shows that not only is the plus size market the most populous (over 67% of women are in the plus size range), it is growing at twice the rate as the straight size market. And that growth not starting from scratch, either: The plus size market is already valued at $541.35 billion – yes, that is billion with a b – and it is forecasted to grow to over $727 billion USD in the next five years alone. The potential is massive and largely untapped, with only 20% of clothing made offered in sizes that fit the majority of women.
So what's really interesting is that the average woman in the United States is a size 18. And plus-size women make up more than half the market. And yet, plus size clothes only make up 19% of all apparel on the market. The fashion brands are not actually meeting the needs of their customers.
So that means plus size clothing has only grown 1% since 2022 in the apparel market. **jaw drop**
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| Studio by Brandon Blackwood Convertible Slit Maxi Dress, $60 (I would get this in every color if it were in my size!) |
And even now, I still see brands, the media and content creators/influencers still misusing the term size inclusive.
Here's an idea... Can we stop using the term 'size inclusive' altogether?
As someone who is a size 4X, when a brand says they are size inclusive and I then see they only offer up to a size 3X, it makes me question where I belong in this narrative and industry.
It creates a false sense of inclusion within our own community! Inclusive means noBODY left behind but the misuse of the term is doing just that by excluding women over a size 3X.
Clothing is a basic need that everyone should have access to. If I need a suit for a job interview or a dress for an event, I should be able to shop for those things just as plus size women under a size 3X do. My money holds the same value as theirs.
I want to implore brands to not make assumptions about the plus size customer. We are shopping in real time because we need clothing now and not 50 pounds from now. Plus size bodies are not temporary. And however you feel about fatness, that should not affect how you run your business, if you want to make money.
Brands, pls take a cue from Universal Standard who offers a size range of 00 to 40. Universal Standard co-founder and CEO, Polina Veksler told Forbes in August 2022:
"Universal Standard has been growing about 60% over the past year, and we hope to be on a similar trend going forward. The fashion industry said a profitable inclusive-sizing brand simply wasn’t possible. We’ve been able to show that Universal Standard has become a profitable business as the world’s most inclusive-sizing brand."
I did fit modeling for US when they first expanded to a size 40 and I can tell you, they focus on fit, quality and design. They always asked for my feedback and always listened to what I had to say. This is why their customer loyalty is high.
Yes, it is an investment to offer a wider size range but let me tell you, if you invest in us by listening to what we want and offering great quality and design that fits, we will be opening our wallets with the quickness.
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| One of my fit sessions at Universal Standard in 2018 SIP Alexandra Waldman, thanks for everything! Miss talking to you. |
While Sarah did say in her review that the fit is generous on many of Blackwood's pieces and their 3XL may fit a size 26, that's still not enough to cater to all the women being left out in fashion, including myself.
We shouldn't have to try to make the clothes fit us by seeking out stretchy fabrics and wearing a smaller size that may be uncomfortable. It's the brand's responsibility to make sure the clothes fit US because at the end of the day, we are paying for you to get it right by buying your pieces.
Listen, this ain't nothing new. I've been talking about this for years and there are others, most notably my sis Saucye West, a trailblazer in this community/industry, who created the #fightforinclusivity movement to push brands to expand sizing.
I'm holding out hope for you, Brandon Blackwood. Because I truly want to support you and give you my money, as I am sure many women out there want to.
Special thanks to Sarah for all she does in our community and industry! Pls go follow her on Instagram here and check out her blog here. And watch her on Ahead of the Curve here.
Are you above a size 3X? What do you think of the term size inclusive and its constant usage? Let me know below in the comments!
"Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do." - Brené Brown
In September 2020, after a photo shoot for Latinx Heritage Month for Lane Bryant, as I looked at my images, I noticed that the lump on my right inner thigh looked larger.
I was taken aback. For years, I've always been self conscious of that lump and learned to love her slowly because it's a part of my body. Despite not loving that part of me 100% (it's a lifelong process), I tried daily to not let my insecurities seize my life and stop me from wearing what I wanted, even if it was visible. But it was extremely hard to fully let go of those insecurities.
It would peek out when I wore a bathing suit, modeled above the knee styles and wore shorts. But when that lump grew larger, my life changed.
I spent two years trying to find out why.
I was in constant pain, had limited mobility, always tired and no appetite. Yet I gained weight and that lump grew larger.
I switched doctors frequently because I was told to get weight loss surgery and could not get a proper diagnosis or find a doctor who could see past my weight and actually treat me as other patients.
I was reminded how most of the medical community looks first and makes a diagnosis by judgment before they even truly look further to see what's wrong. They believe that being fat is always the problem and losing weight is always the cure. And that's not always the case. I'm proof of that.
My labs showed that I'm anemic with high levels of inflammation in my blood. That's it. I'm not diabetic, cholesterol is fine and I don't have any of the issues these doctors assumed I had because I'm fat. The third primary care physician I saw, sent me to get a venous Doppler ultrasound on my legs to check for blood clots. They didn't find anything.
It took the vascular specialist a minute to look at my leg and tell me it was lymphedema. And this is when I learned more about this disease that doesn't have a cure and would change my life. I learned more about the lymphatic system and its importance. And realized I had to make some changes in my life.
First things first, I have to wear compression garments for the rest of my life. Second, I have to use a compression pump daily on my legs and feet (60 minutes per leg). Thankfully, these two things will help the size of my leg decrease by moving the lymphatic fluid to up and out of my body + keep my swelling down. Once my leg size decreases, I will go to Decongestive lymphedema therapy (DLT) where I will do exercises, learn how to bandage my legs and other key things I need to learn for self-care.
I don't get hungry often because I am in constant pain + I'm perimenopausal (another thing to deal with at the same time!) so I am now eating 6 small meals versus 3 regular meals. I have to ensure I get some protein and watch my sugar. Processed foods and sugars cause me to have flare-ups where my swelling is so bad and I feel so tired. So I'm exploring a new way of eating (I'm still trying to go gluten-free, ugh) because I have to eat foods that are mostly anti-inflammatory.
I have to keep myself impeccably clean and while I was a clean freak before, I'm talking 2 showers a day plus constant cleanliness to ensure I don't cause any skin infections, most notably cellulitis. My skin is always dry and I bruise easily. Thank goodness for First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Cream and Eucerin, who both make amazing fragrance-free lotions/creams that are great for severe dry skin.
I'm always tired and don't sleep well sometimes. But on a good night, if I can get my 8 hours of sleep, I have a good day ahead of me because sleep helps.
I also have to be mindful when I travel. No more direct flights over 3 hours. I have to make sure I am not sitting for long periods of time. Elevate my legs. Move. But also be mindful of the type of exercise I do.
No more saunas at the spa. I have to avoid extreme heat and cold temperatures.
BUT. I can't really complain because while there is no cure for lymphedema, I can live. I just need to make some adjustments. However, the mental side of all of this has been hard.
To go from being a person who was free as a bird, traveling the world and being fancy to walking with a rollator and monitoring everything I do with my body, is a mindf**k. I love jeans but my leg has gotten so big that right now I can't wear pants unless it's stretch leggings and yoga pants. Sometimes I don't even know my size because my legs are different sizes while my waist is still the same size it was years ago.
Therapy has been a godsend. My therapist has seen me through the loss of my dad, my brother, niece, my mom and best friend Herman... then my own childhood trauma... and now this.
My body feels like the enemy. My mind and body are definitely not in sync. However, this diagnosis has also made me appreciate my body more. I know that sounds weird after saying my body feels like the enemy so hear me out.
I spent most of my life so self-conscious of the lump on my right thigh to the point where it dictated what I wore and how I moved through life. And honestly, that is no way to live. We should all give life 100% and just dive in. Show up for yourself and show out. If I have learned anything after losing so many people, it's this... we never know when it's our time and once you spend your time, you cannot get that time back. That's why it's so important to be present and not be so focused on the future. How ironic is that? We spend our present moments, which we have control over, worrying about the future, which we don't have control over. We never know what's going to happen next but we know what is happening right now in this present moment.
For me, I am going to spend my present moments taking care of my health while being around the people who bring me joy and make me laugh. I'm starting to reconnect with people and that makes me happy. I will continue to heal and strengthen my self-love in the body I am in now. I know that my body will change but there's nothing wrong with loving it while you're in transition. When you love your body as it is now, you will want to be good to your body in whatever that means to you. A Before is not a bad thing. To me, life is a state of transition where we are constantly evolving and changing. Nothing is ever final.
I personally don't like to say "Before" and "After". I like to say "Back then", "Now", "What I look forward to" while knowing that my body is beautiful at any stage of my life because it is mine and it has done some incredible things. It's not just a vanity thing. Sure, I want to look cute but my body is not just meant to be looked at and admired. It is also meant to take me on my life's adventure and do things that I thought were impossible. And believe me, size or weight has nothing to do with what adventures I can go on. It is all up to me and the stage of the journey that I'm on.
I will never hold back from living because of a body part. Never. Once my leg gets smaller, I will appreciate that lump because it will never hold me back from living or being cute. I'm living for me and not the world. Let the world stare or say what they will. All the validation I need comes from me.
The last thing my mom said to me before she passed was "Marcy, you have to take care of yourself. Please." She always felt I took care of others but did not take care of myself in the same way. So, Mom, no worries... I am taking care of myself. I got the memo. (Gosh, I miss her so much!)
Stay tuned as I will continue to share my lymphedema journey on this blog. It's hard to be transparent but I hope my story will help someone on their journey. I got tired of hiding, to be honest. I never want to feel ashamed or negatively about myself ever again. This is me and I am making it my life's mission to show up for myself always.
My words of wisdom in this very moment: Always be your own advocate, ask questions and stand up for yourself. Fight for yourself. You are worth it.
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