Fearless Inspiration: Changing Your Mindset + Acceptance = A Happy Life

Saturday, December 28, 2013

I don't keep unflattering pictures of myself anywhere. I can't help the ones that others take of me and I don't think too much of that. But the ones I do have control over, I delete and keep it moving. I do that because I feel like seeing unflattering pictures of myself is putting myself through some unnecessary negativity. But I have also learned over the years that taking photos of myself made me such a critical person because I scrutinized over every single photo to the point where none of them were perfect. That critical side of me started to spill over into other aspects of my life and it really affected my spirit in a negative way. Then one day, a lightbulb went off over my head and I had an epiphany.

None of those pictures will ever be perfect because... I am not perfect.

And me being this way is no better than someone who takes pictures and photoshops them to the point where the model doesn't even look real anymore. My search for the perfect image was taking away from me loving myself as I am. We have all been brainwashed by society to think that if we don't look like who we see on the magazine covers or if our bodies are not a certain size, that we are not normal and not beautiful.

Does that piss you off? I know it pissed me off for a long time when I was in my 20s and was channeling my inner Chuck D/Joan Jett persona in college. How dare the world tell me that I am not normal or beautiful because I wasn't a size 2 or had pin-straight hair and perfect skin? But then I realized that fighting the world is not the answer. My anger was not healthy and it was taking my attention away from truly taking care of myself because I wanted to rebel from society. Which meant eating whatever I wanted and doing whatever I wanted.

We can't change the world until we change how we feel about ourselves first. We can't expect for the world to accept us unconditionally if we can't fully love ourselves for who we are right in this moment. Once we change our own mindset and be who we are with no excuses and fear, that alone will inspire others to do the same. It's really simple as that but so hard to actually accomplish because undoing years of brainwashing is not easy.

I personally don't buy into what society says is beautiful anymore. After years of working on me and building my self-love, I now know that happiness does not come in a dress size. Happiness comes from within.

I love myself as I am right now. I loved myself 3 years ago at a size 32. And I love myself today just the same at a size 26. I may have gotten smaller but my love for myself remains the same. Life didn't suddenly get amazing because my dress size got smaller. My life has always been amazing, even the ups and the downs. No one's life is perfect so we all have to roll with the punches. Doesn't mean life isn't good overall.

Change your mindset and you will change your life. I'm telling you.

Everything starts with you and accepting who you are in all of your fabulousness. Like I always say, we all have a choice. When we CHOOSE to not accept what society is telling us on how we should look and what is "perfect" and we CHOOSE to instead begin a love affair with ourselves, that is when your life will change.

You will want to take care of you, whether it's getting healthier, dressing your body better...shoot, even cut your hair! ::points at self:: It may sound selfish but you have to put yourself first. But it is not selfish if you put yourself first for the right reasons. How can you be there for others and take care of others if you're not doing that for yourself?

When you take care of yourself physically, you are healing yourself mentally, emotionally and spiritually. We often seek happiness from others when in reality, all we have to do is look within ourselves for that happiness.

I still chuckle about the fact that I have lost weight and didn't even know it. I just decided to give up soda a year ago (my 1-yr anniversary was yesterday) and started eating healthier. I really just wanted to feel better and get healthier. I haven't weighed myself in over a year. But I do take my measurements from time to time when I am ordering from my favorite retailer eShakti. And that's when I noticed I was getting smaller. Then the comments started rolling in. People would see me at events and etc and be shocked at how great I looked.

To me, I have always looked great but of course, there goes that society brainwashing again where people feel that losing weight is the ultimate compliment...but I digress.

Anyway, the biggest lesson in all of this is that I have learned to not seek validation from others. I couldn't care less if someone noticed my weight loss or not. What counts is that I feel good and I'm happy. I'm doing it for me. Not to prove anything to anyone or to seek approval from society. I'm doing it to honor who I am by hopefully extending my life span and making it easier for this body to explore the world. By being good to myself, making myself stronger and healing myself, I am giving myself the gift of happiness no matter what size I end up to be.

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